Two weeks ago actually, I was finally told that I got this job. I’ve been trying to it get since January 6th. I didn’t post about getting it earlier, because I’ve been working & fighting off a cold. It starts Tues. Feb. 28. * Happy dance. *
This hasn’t eliminated my worries, anxiety or depression, but at least I don’t feel hopeless or suicidal. I feel like I’m climbing out of a pit of bad luck & unhappiness, but I’m not completely safe yet. Having a secure income is so immensely important for feeling safe & like I have some control over my life again.
In the meantime, I have 2 more days left at my minimum-wage phone bank job. I’ve grown to kind of like working there, but not enough that I’d want to keep working there if I didn’t have to do it. It’s still not the kind of job that many people would take on full-time if they’re not desperate to be able to pay the bills.
In the last 2 weeks, my current landlady failed to get the heater fixed in our house when the pilot light went out. The cold in my room then caused me to get a cold, which now seems to be resolving. I bought a small space heater, but not until after I was already sick. Then I couldn’t sell plasma, so lost the opportunity to make an extra $125 or more before the end of this month. Eventually I called the heater repair company and had them come out to fix the heater. They came the day after our landlady came back from the Bay Area, so she had to pay for them to turn the heater back on. My other roommate & I are planning to deduct the cost of the space heaters we bought from our rent on March 1st. We don’t plan to stay here through the summer if we can help it, because the house is going to be too hot & this landlady is too irresponsible & uneven in how she wants to charge us for rent.
I suppose this post should be all happy, excited & thankful, but really, I won’t feel like I can relax & be happy until I’m sure I’m going to be able to keep my new job. Life has just been too unfair & hard for me the last 10 years, for me to just relax & be happy. I am grateful, but I also want to be cautious.